Judging vs. Coaching: "American Idol" vs. "The Voice"

I read an article on Yahoo recently that said Mark Burnett believes The Voice wins in ratings because, "it's a kinder show.". That got me to thinking about one of Ken Sande's principles in biblical peacemaking, "Constructive Correction is a sign of genuine love." (emphasis mine).  Most of us will readily admit that the biggest reason we avoid confrontation is that it tends to be negative, judgmental, even humiliating, not constructive.  For example, I once had a principal criticize me for having a can of pop on my desk , but she found no fault with my lesson plan or my presentation.  Definitely not constructive.  Others may avoid confronting because they are afraid they may have to face up to their own faults.  (Ken Sande refers to this as "The Golden Result", meaning that people will usually treat you they way you treat them.  If you judge them, you will be judged by them.)

In chapter 7 of  The Peacemaker, Ken reminds us that, "He (Jesus) wants us to remember and imitate his shepherd love for us-to seek after others to help them turn from sin and be restored to God and those they have offended." (see Matt. 18:21-35).  We are to help others see their sin, not point and wag our fingers in disapproval because we "all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23).  I believe it is here that we find the difference between American Idol and The Voice.

On American Idol, there are "judges", while The Voice has "coaches".  Those words give two totally different pictures.  When I think of a "judge", I think of someone in a black robe presiding over a courtroom (I love to watch Law and Order).  Others may think of someone like Alfred Molina's character in Monday Mornings, a superior who puts you in front of your peers to deconstruct your every decision.  Whatever you think of when you hear the word "judge", I'll bet it's negative.

A coach is perceived entirely different.  While some basketball fans may think of Bob Knight's infamous chair throwing incident (Google Bob Knight chair!), most envision someone who comes along beside you to help you correct a swing or a jumpshot because they have struggled with the same thing.  A coach doesn't just correct you, he (or she) encourages and motivates you.  They cheer you on from the sidelines.  They want you to succeed, and they discipline or correct you because they care about you and want you to grow.

As Christians, that is the biggest difference between judging and coaching.  When we judge, we put ourselves in God's chair and look down on the other person with a superiority that belongs only to God.  We put them down and make ourselves more righteous and that is not our purpose.  God is the only judge.  We can only coach. We must come alongside and encourage, motivate, and yes, correct.  But we must do so lovingly and with the understanding that we are just as sinful (if not more) yet Christ died for us anyway.  But maybe it's just me...